I WAS going to feature the next stop on our look at collectable building brick figures(where we looked at Mega Bloks Kubros and Lego BrickHeadz, for anyone just coming in) and wrap up this theme with a look at some BrickHeadz bootlegs. Because they were the final sets I had on hand that matched the theme, and, as far as I knew, the final line that had anything to do with cashing in on the collectable, deformed figure craze. So I'd simply review them, then wash my hands of the whole thing and not have to worry about talking about buildable collectable figures for a good long time!
However, while I was doing research for that line, I came across information that led me to TWO more cash-in figure lines! Both bootlegs of lines I had already shown on this blog! And, since they look like something I ABSOLUTELY have to talk about, and they were cheap and available*, I went ahead and bought them to feature here. ...Because I'm an obsessive idiot like that.
*You make your own joke of that wording.
So with the new addition of sets I literally just learned about, that means THREE lines left to feature that are based on the vinyl figure craze of today! ...But, since I appreciate my audience, including those more interested in the games I feature than the brick sets, I've decided I'm not going to dedicate FIVE weeks to this phenomenon and lose everyone's attention. Therefore, I'm going to put the theme on hold for a while, feature my usual Plug n Play and pirate games, then come back and rededicate the theme to BOOTLEG building brick collectable "vinyl" figures. We take a needed break(especially with how bad the last batch was), I give the sets time to arrive, and I meet the wants of the other half of my reader base. Win/Win/Win.
And whaddaya know?! That segues perfectly into the game I have for you today! Let's take a look at Big Bonus Slots! ...The game, that is. ...Though if you know of a slot machine about to pay out big bonuses, please let me know.
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Name: Big Bonus Slots
Distributor: Senario
Release Date: 2005
Genre: Gambling
I'm not much of a gambling person. ...In terms of gaming, that is. I'm already pouring thousands of dollars into things to resell and into my subscription crate that I'm taking a risk on people noticing and deciding to buy before I go bankrupt, plus I'm gambling all this time into my blog in the hope that people like you will read it, and I'll eventually make it into a relatively well-paying career. And that's all the stress and risk I need in my life!
However, when I get the urge to gamble with money, real or virtual, I prefer to play card games like Texas Hold 'Em, Video Poker, or the classic Blackjack. I like having some control over the outcome, and feeling like I'm not winning/losing based on pure chance. I know that it all still comes down to blind luck, but there's some form of skill involved, where I feel that if I can assess the situation and get a feel for the game, that I can tell if I have a winning or losing hand and bet accordingly to take advantage of the most probable outcome. ...Of course, I'm a pretty aggressive and impatient player, so I can easily end up losing the fortune I just made when frustrated...
I'm also a bit obsessed with collecting these slot machine/virtual poker banks whenever I find them in the wild. ...Possible future review?
But, no matter what your casino preference is, video games have you covered for pretty much any style you prefer! ...Mostly because gambling games are some of the easiest games TO program and profit off of.
We've had virtual casino games since basically the invention of video games themselves. I'm not a programmer, yet even I know that there's almost nothing to creating most of these games. Simply design some visuals that represent the real-life counterparts, write(or "borrow") a program that makes them output the same actions, program WIN/LOSE results, throw in a randomizer and a winnings pot, maybe some "If X Then Y" AI if it's a game to be played against computer opponents, and BOOM! There's no advanced AI, no physics, no complex rules, no need for realistic, breathtaking environments, just cards, dice, and basic designs and guides to how the player rakes in the pot. I'll bet you dollars to doughnuts that even an amateur programmer can develop a competent gambling program for any system in less than a day from the ground up! ...And if you do, please send it to me. I'd like to see how you interpret this challenge!
Of course, the ease it is to program virtual slots and cards means that the market is absolutely FLOODED with thousands, if not millions, of different electronic and virtual casino games. Consoles, PCs, dedicated handhelds, minigames in other games, online sites, smartphones, all places that have been CRAMMED full of these types of games since electronic signals could first be interpreted by a screen! It's virtually impossible to play a game on your phone or tablet without an ad for another way to play slots appearing every 2 minutes, and from our early days with Pokemon to our later gaming with Grand Theft Auto, there's always some risk/reward way in most games to earn extra cash and scratch that gambling itch we as a species seem to naturally have.
Why else are we obsessed with both physical and virtual subscription boxes and blind bags?
It's this ease that makes cosmetics probably the most important factor in getting a gambling game to stand out. Anyone can program a simple casino game, but that makes it harder to make it memorable.
Personally, my favorite gambling game is the Poker Night at the Inventory series, where you get to play Texas Hold 'Em against characters from Homestar Runner, Sam & Max, Team Fortress 2, Penny Arcade, Portal, Evil Dead, Borderlands, and Venture Bros! It's that surrealism and Telltale's trademark cel-shaded shadowy art style that makes playing cards with these characters an unforgettable experience! Especially since each one of them brings their own distinctive personalities to the table for the others to work off of, in a situation that would NEVER happen otherwise! It's weird, it's funny, it's surreal, and I LOVE it!
How can you not love a game where Tycho Brahe is threatened by Strong Bad, Max, and Heavy Weapons Guy?!
Needless to say, the Plug n Play market is no stranger to casino games, and the need to provide memorable visuals is just as important here as in any other game form. ...Sadly, this is also the niche where you're least likely to find said visuals...
I own and have played several of these consoles, and I can say that nearly every single one is just giving us the bare minimum. They've designed some low-res card sprites, put them in front of a black or green background, and thrown in barely functional AI and game rules to make them resemble their real life counterparts. ...Minus any fun...
I'll probably feature these consoles in the future, possibly one after another in a similar style to the Sudoku games I did last year given how little there is to talk about, but, needless to say, most of these games aren't worth your time and you're better off just buying a deck of cards and playing against yourself...
So with the low standards of Plug n Play gambling machines, where does today's offering stand? Well, it already starts pretty well with the fact it's one of the few boxed Plug n Play games I have! ...That probably shouldn't count for it, considering that should be the standard of any Plug n Play game, but still. Already better visuals than I've seen with one of these consoles!
I like how big and flashy the game's logo is. It tells us they're "Big Bonus Slots", and they want us to know that they're BIG and they have bonus features! It's designed in just that right style, where it's not your basic, boring text over a PNG of a slot machine, but it's still realistic enough to avoid being too cartoony that it would scare its adult audience off. Plus, the "Bonus Slots" section is coated in shiny, reflective, gold-colored foil, pandering to the basic instinct of mammals of being attracted to shiny objects. It's a very eye-catching image, and, if the logo is anything to go off of, we're promised a fun, colorful game!
...Of course, I've been promised that before in the past...
The details on the box are even raised! These bumps are literal bumps you can run your finger over, and the outline of the machine and its letters clearly has ridges that stick out from the rest of the box. We haven't even opened it yet, and they've put more work into designing the box than I've seen them put into a lot of consoles!
Also, nice choice of the blue star background.
"25 Bonus Rounds!" ...And seeing as how you're telling us that without any context, am I just to assume I'll be playing everything from Super Mario Bros. 3's Toad House to Sonic 2's half-pipe? ...Because if there was a game that contained solely bonus stages from other games, I'd be first in line for that!
Besides displaying the company logo, which we'll get to in a second, it also tells us it's a "Wireless Video Game", and it "Plugs Right Into Your TV, No Software Required!" ...Considering this was made back when we still used analog CRT TVs, I sure hope there wasn't a Plug n Play game that required software to be installed on the TV. Rather impossible, that...
The back tells us all about the game, and gives us the standard screenshots to try to sell it to us. ...Which, considering this was $50+ back in 2005, was sorely needed to divert our attention away from Knights of the Old Republic II, God of War, Doom 3, Lego Star Wars, Jade Empire, Pokemon Emerald, Civilization IV, SoulCalibur III, Star Wars Battlefront II, Guitar Hero, Kingdom Hearts II, and, of course, Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas. ...Actually, how did this game sell copies...?
The blurb does its typical job of overselling the game to us, basically telling us that playing this game is the exact same thing as going to Vegas or Atlantic City! Does this game have Circus Circus or M&Ms World? I didn't think so!
Also, it says that it "transforms your living room into a casino so full of exciting slot machines, you'll think you're in Vegas...", then later tells us there's "5 different slot machines." ...I don't think a casino with only 5 slot machines stands a chance in Vegas...
Well, maybe if one was the Back to the Future video slot machine!
"5 Different 'Machines'!" See? Even the box can't keep up the claim that it'll literally fill your living room with slot machines.
"Big Reel Action!" ...Eh, that's completely subjective. I've seen reels as big as car tires, but I'm guessing that's a little harder to display on your standard TV.
"6 Player Lifetime Scores!" ...If you have 6 people all wanting to play slots, I think you might as well make a group trip to Vegas...
The back also gives a diagram of the console and controller, making claims such as "Working Slot Machine Lever!", and "Game Console With Fast 16-bit Microprocessor!" Well, considering how the lever doesn't actually affect the gears of the machine, I don't think it's a "working slot machine lever"(though I hope it DOES work!) And, considering this was the age of the 128-bit processor, it BETTER be able to process 16-bits quickly!
And don't forget the tagline "Real Slot Action... At Home!" And the way that's worded, it legitimately sounds like it was made up on the spot.
"We need a tagline for our product in 10 seconds!"
"Uhhh... Real... Slot Action! ...At Home?"
"We'll take it!"
"...I literally just said the first five words that came to mind-"
"I DON'T CARE!"
Oh, but we're not done with the packaging yet, because, as with the American Idol Be a Star on TV game, this is a flip cover box! Meaning two more sides to find hilarity on!
On the top flap, it repeats the tagline on the back, and shows us a middle-aged woman who's overly-excited to be playing slots in her living room! ...She could be out spoiling her grandkids or even going to Vegas herself, but nope. A cheap electronic slot game is where it's at! Come on, lady! Get out of the house once in a while!
In fact, I don't even think she's playing the game. I think they just copied an artist's rendering and Photoshopped it into her hands! ...You know, just a hunch.
I don't even think that's a real TV! It's a flatscreen, which not many people had in 2005, and it has no buttons, no speakers, no cords, even the console itself is nowhere to be found! I think they literally just made a TV out of cardboard and taped an image of the game on it to make her think she's playing slots!
Apparently, I have greatly overestimated this woman's mental faculties. Please stay inside, ma'am, and try not to hurt yourself or others! The hair curler is not a lollipop!
Though I am curious what her cassette tape collection is like. It's a dual tape deck, as well! Maybe she can make me a mix tape? ...When she's done staring at a piece of paper and imagining she has a controller in her hands, that is...
The bottom gives us a look through the window at the console and controller, letting us know we're actually getting a console and the box isn't full of bounced checks, one of Vegas' main exports...
We're again told that it's a "Wireless handset with a real working lever", and that the "Lights flash when the lever is pulled!" ...Except the back told us that the lights flash for "Winning Combinations." ...So which one is it? Am I bombarded with lights every time I pull the lever, or just when I hit the jackpot? I sure hope it's the latter... For the batteries' sake.
Speaking of contradictions, we're told on the other side that we can "Plug Into TV" and "Play Right Away!" Before being told we need to "Set Up & Play In Minutes!" ...Ok, are we playing right away, or does it take some time before we can get everything started? Because if it's the latter, that sort of defeats the purpose of a Plug n Play console...
Just wondering if you're Hamburger Helper or Instant Mashed Potatoes-level with your inaccurate description here...
Once we finally get the box open, we can get a better look at the console and controller we were promised. And that they do exist and they're not simply stickers plastered over the tray! Hey, you can't be too sure in this day and age...
The console itself is nothing flashy. It's simply a black box with an infrared receiver and a power switch on the side.
However, it DOES tell us what it is on the bottom. Which is VERY helpful with these things, as I've probably passed over numerous Plug n Play consoles in thrift stores because I had no idea if they were actually consoles.
Also, the battery door isn't screw-sealed. Good. I HATE screws!
The controller is where all the style is. ...Though even that's not saying much. It's mostly a lump of black plastic with a sticker of a slot machine screen on the front and some lights surrounding it.
The lever doesn't even have that much swing to it, simply being another button that you press down slightly. Still, I guess it beats repeatedly tapping a smartphone screen all day...
And then there are buttons. ...Boy, are there buttons. ...Boy, howdy, this console certainly has buttons on it. ...Moving on.
The back of the console is the most exciting feature! Just look at all the fingerprints I've left on the cheap black plastic! A lot of history to be found here! I should frame this as a collage and keep it for posterity's sake.
The bottom of this controller also has the name of the console on it, so if you ever find one piece on its own at a thrift store, you'll know what you need to find to play Match-2. ...Which I'm pretty sure is also contained on this console, so you'll get some practice before the real thing!
Being either new or barely used, this console even still comes with the random inserts they include about warranty information and other products in the line.
Including a Plug n Play version of The Apprentice! I did not know this existed until this moment, and now it's become more important than breathing!
It even still has its instruction manual!
A pretty extensive manual, at that. Not only does it contain the basic instructions on how to get it set up and start a game
But also an extensive section on each of the bonus games and how to get the most out of them! ...Of course, I'll be covering this below as I'm playing the game, so no reason to bore you here. ...If you're not gone already, with how long this intro has taken...
But remember! This game is only for those 12 and older! ...Despite the gambling age of America being 18-21... Maybe just keep this away from your kids altogether and prevent them from getting hooked before they can have an actual gambling outlet...
Alright, let's plug this thing in and ride the carousels.
For some reason, my TV and video capture refuses to record or even display the startup for this game, so I don't even know if there's a startup that displays company logos. However, as the box helpfully lets us know, this game comes to us from Senario.
Senario was(is?) a pretty prolific company from the early 2000s. It was founded in 2000 in Woodstock, Illinois, and its major product development was in electronics.
Somewhat in commercial office supplies like calculators, spelling checkers, and even paper shredders
But mostly electronic toys and games. You may know them as the license holders for toys like Drip Drops, Zibits, Battle Bands, Little Inu, Huru Humi, and a boatload of other miscellaneous toys and playsets.
Including holding the rights to LittleBigPlanet plush toys.
Apparently, they're still around and producing things to this day. ...At least, according to this Crunchbase page that lists them as "Active", and provides a link to their site.
Which redirects me to their YouTube page, which has a grand total of 12 videos, nine of which are over 6 years old. So if this company still exists, they're holding on by the tips of their fingers...
During their heyday, they also released Plug n Play games. ...A LOT of Plug n Play games, all of differing quality and play value. We've actually already seen one on this blog with their Ultimate Sudoku Game, and you're forgiven if you haven't seen it or already forgotten about it, but that's just the tip of the iceberg!
Sure, they had the standard licenses, mostly from game shows like Who Wants to Be a Millionaire, Win, Lose, or Draw, and the previously mentioned The Apprentice
As well as a handful of Marvel games
Some Guitar Hero knockoffs
And a LOT of DDR clones
Though they're probably most well known for their line of "knockoff" Plug n Play systems(which we'll start looking at very shortly), most under their VS. Maxx brand. ...And as someone who's played a large chunk of them, I'm not that crazy about having to eventually revisit this niche...
They also had a few original titles, and this game is one of them. Which extreme does it fit into on the Senario Plug n Play chart? Let's find out.
The game starts up with the title screen of the Big Bonus Slots logo, with the star background scrolling by as some fairy jazzy music plays. Not the most exciting of title screens, but I've definitely seen worse on this blog...
Also, the music is indeed catchy. ...Don't get used to it, though. There's very little music across this console.
As it claims, it does indeed keep scores for 6 different people. ...Why there'd be six people in a room wanting to play this, I have no idea...
Maybe they're all different personalities of Sybil here?
As advertised, there are 5 different slots to choose from:
Seven Seventy-Seven
Aces & Eights
Pacific Paradise
Crazy 8-Ball
Dame Fortune
Each one takes a different amount of credits to play, getting more expensive as the list goes on. Seven Seventy-Seven is simply 1 dollar each credit, while Dame Fortune requires $100 per credit! And this is why you can't pick the higher-paying slots to begin with.
You start with $1000, so trying to play Dame Fortune, unless you have a leprechaun on your side wearing an outfit made entirely of horseshoes and 4-leaf clovers that can align Jupiter with Mars on command, will almost instantly result in losing all your money, causing the screen to flash "Game Over", before kicking you back to the main screen with your data reset. ...I guess that's a better fate than the real-life consequence...
Since this is a slot machine simulator, there's not exactly a point to discussing each stage in detail. It's the exact same thing for each machine: Bet your credits, spin the wheel, collect your winnings if applicable, and play the bonus game when you've earned it. If you've ever played video slots, you know exactly how this works. And if this is your first time, as it was for me, you still learn within about 30 seconds.
You don't even have to pull the knob! Simply by pressing Bet Max, as I did throughout the playthrough, the wheel turns automatically. This is literally a game you can play almost in its entirety just by pressing a single button...
Jacks is more complex than this!
Also, my first guess earlier was correct. The knob flashes lights EVERY time it's pushed, not just when you score a jackpot or simply earn credits. ...So to save my retinas, I stuck with the buttons.
I will admit that I learned a bit more about video slots than I previously gave them credit for. Since this was my first time playing, I didn't know that there were certain bonus items that also gave credits, and that the more credits you bet each time, the more lines were opened to score rows and said bonus items. If a certain item(s) was in the right place, it counted for each line that crossed it, and I could get matches diagonally as well as in a straight row! ...I'm sure a lot of casino veterans are looking at this and going "Oh, come on...", but hey, this was my first video slot experience! I can say that this is one of the very rare times a Plug n Play game actually taught me something! ...Besides "Don't jiggle the console or the batteries will fall out."
Once you're tired of a certain slot, you hit the "Cash Out" button, and you're kicked back to the selection menu to decide a new machine, your credits from previous sessions carrying over. So at the very least, even if you're not winning anything material that can be used to buy anything, your winnings still pool! ...As will something else if you're the addictive sort who can't take their eyes off the pretty wheels to take care of essential needs... I wonder what the cleaning bills for the stools at casinos are like...?
Since there's not much detail to go into with the game as a whole, I'll just give my usual quick rundown of each stage and the Bonus Rounds each one offers. Though I'll still try to give my opinion on each and throw in a few terrible wisecracks. ...Because I'm snarky like that.
Seven Seventy-Seven. The first sets of slots and a literal "fruit machine." Obviously, it's very fruit-based, with lemons, oranges, and limes as the main images, with cherries as the Bonuses, and bells, bars, and, of course, sevens as the premiums. It's also the cheapest, so if you have any hope to get to the next few machines, expect to spend a good, long time here.
The bonus games here are(in the order I encountered them):
Big Bell Bonus. Encountered when a payline displays 2 bells. It's the Cup & Ball/Three Card Monte mechanic. Numbers are hidden under the bells, which are then shuffled around faster and faster until they stop and you pick one of the bells. Whatever number is under the bell is the number of free credits you get. Nothing else to say. Just a good way to occasionally get some credits without fear of losing.
It was also the one that popped up the most for me. In 30 minutes, it popped up 5 times, which, for a Bonus Game, might as well have been every other spin. No complaints. It just lets you know that this is a great slot to start with. ...Not to continually play, due to the low payout, but still great to rake in the chips for later slots.
Cherry Bomb Attack. Encountered once 9 cherries total have appeared on the slot face. Move the basket left and right and catch the cherries! Once 40 cherries have fallen, the number you caught is the number of free spins you take with you!
This is what clued me in that the odds here might not be in the player's favor(big shock, I know). I've had to speed up most of the GIFs here to fit storage limits, but even at normal speed, the cherries still fall FAST! That, or the basket moves VERY slowly. Either way, you'll be lucky if you catch half of the cherries that fall. Especially since a lot of them like to start falling on the opposite end of the screen... Still, it's fun. Not that rewarding, but fun.
Sour Lemon Surprise. Encountered when 9 lemon payouts have occurred. There's a number on each lemon segment. Simply spin it, then stop when the number you're aiming for is over the glass. You get a tall, cool glass of lemonade, and the number of free spins you stopped it on! Really, what is there to complain about here?
...No seriously, is there anything? Straightforward. Moving on.
Missing Seven Madness. Encountered by getting two "Sevens" in a row. You start with five spins, and, every time you roll anything BUT a 7, you get five more! You can cash out at any time, but be warned that rolling a 7 loses everything you've banked...
This is one of the first bonus games that also incorporates a bit of risk, as you can end up walking away with nothing. And I'm not too crazy about these certain games, since you've basically stopped ONE game that's left purely up to chance to play ANOTHER game left purely to chance! If you're going to incorporate a bonus game, give it a bit of a skill factor and leave it up to the player how much they cash out! ...Or at least automate these games, so they don't interrupt the flow of the slots...
Fruit Salad Whirl. Encountered when a fruit icon(that's not a lemon) appears in every corner. Simply pick a fruit, and the more times the fruit appears on the following table, the more credits you rake in!
This was the hardest game with this machine to encounter, and arguably the least interactive. You just pick a fruit and collect the number that pops up. I appreciate that it's a game you technically can't lose, but for such an uncommon game, I was hoping for a little more interactivity. How much fun would it be if you played one of the four fruits, then the computer played a fruit, and it kept going until the board was either full of fruit, or the computer played the exact same fruit as you did? That's a salad I could go for! ...Still, it gives you free credits. Why am I complaining?
Aces & Eights. The next slot machine heard that you like casinos, so it put a casino in the casino! Here, you have card back patterns, diamonds, spades, hearts, and clubs as the main images, with 8's as the Bonuses and A's as the premium. This is the easiest machine to encounter Bonus Games with, and consequently the machine I spent the least amount of time with, so once you're confident you have enough credits from the last slot, this is where you go to bet it all!
The bonus games are:
Five Card Draw. Encountered when two or more diamonds are in a payline. This is just standard video poker. Five cards are dealt, which you then decide which to keep and which to reshuffle. The final strength of the cards equals the amount of free spins you take with you.
This is my favorite card game included, and only one of two "interactive" card games on this machine. It plays just like it should, and if you've played it in real life or on Grand Theft Auto, you know exactly what I mean. I could play this game forever! ...Too bad it didn't give me that option...
Five Card Stud. Encountered when two or more clubs are in a payline. Repeatedly hit the button to draw cards, and collect an amount of spins at the end based on the hand's strength. ...Simple as that.
As I mentioned, most of the card games here require no major input from the player. You just push a button, cards are dealt, and that's it! You don't get to choose if you want to fold, or which cards you want to keep, you're simply given whatever shows up at the end! And for card games, that's inexcusable... Why even have the option for player input if the player doesn't get to PLAY?!
Jokers Wild. Encountered when 9 turns go by where an A or 8 does NOT show up. Choose a suit, and the game plays 52 pick-up. The number of cards in the suit that are displayed face-up, multiplied by the number of Jokers of that color, equal the number of credits you receive.
This is the only other card game where you're given any choice. ...And it boils down to a less-rewarding version of Fruit Salad Whirl. If you're excited by viewing cards being shuffled into six different piles, then this is the game for you! ...Also, you need to get out more...
Texas Hold 'Em. Encountered when two or more spades are in a payline. Again, continually hit the button until all cards are drawn and collect the number of credits rewarded.
The same complaint as Five Card Stud, only WORSE, since this is my favorite card game! You could have made it work as an actual game! Give the player some spins, let them decide whether to fold and keep the spins, or play for the chance of more spins! Again, if you're going to throw the rules out the window, why bother using this game?
Seven Card Stud. Encountered when two or more Hearts are in a playline. Exactly the same as Five Card Stud, only SEVEN cards! ...Nothing more to say.
Nothing more to say here, either. For a slot machine based around card games, there were certainly a lot of "cards", but a severe lack of "games"...
Pacific Paradise. A beach-themed slot machine, with sun, sand, surf, and, hopefully, beach-side fun! Sand dollars litter these slots, with treasure chests as the Bonuses, and shells, sun, palm trees, seahorses, and mermaids all offering premiums! Due to how the Bonus Games are laid out, expect to spend the most time here if you're trying to see all 5 games. Still, if you're lucky, you'll get to eat cake by the ocean! ...You know, if you brought cake to begin with...
The bonus games are:
Coconut Surprise. Encountered when two or more palm trees are in a playline. Monkeys in the trees are bullying another monkey on the ground by throwing coconuts at him! You must safely guide the monkey back and forth across the screen, as each coconut shot to the noggin means fewer free spins for you! Keep him as safe as possible for 30 seconds, and cash out at the end!
Out of all the Bonus Games on this console, this one is my favorite. It feels the most like a "game", with strategy, timing, a controllable character, and a goal to continually work towards! Plus, the animation's pretty good, the backgrounds and sprites are bright and colorful, and the gameplay is fun and engaging. This is a game I wouldn't mind playing on its own! ...If it paid out credits, that is.
However, considering its length, it can get a little tedious. Especially considering this is possibly the game you're going to encounter the most out of all of them. When I played this console, I encountered this game TEN TIMES in 45 minutes! That means roughly 15% of my time on these slots was spent solely on this game! Trust me when I say that after a while, I was the one who wanted to throw coconuts!
Also, minus several points for still having a chance of losing spins after the game technically ends...
Shell Game. Encountered when a total of 9 seashells have appeared. NOT the shell game you're thinking of. Instead, it's your standard memory game. You have three chances to pick two shells and get the best match you can! Shells deal out the most free spins! ...Which is a given for something called "Shell Game"...
This game's alright, I guess. It's your standard matching game, the one we've played since we were two! Except this is for adults, considering we're wagering on it! ...Isn't it amazing how something suddenly becomes 18+ when money is involved? Next time you're watching cartoons with your kids, make a bet on the outcome with them. See how quickly your significant other gets angry with you!
Seahorse Races. Encountered when a total of 9 seahorses have appeared. A very simplistic horse race minigame. Pick the seahorse you think will win, and whatever place it takes is the amount of spins you get! ...Do I need to explain it any further?
It's a fine game that I enjoy a bit. It's the joy of playing the ponies without the bookie middleman! ...Or the cash!
Pirates Gold. Encountered when two or more treasure chests appear on the payline. It's a random guessing game, with six islands to choose from. Pick an island and receive free spins, which you can then cash or continue playing with to chance getting MORE spins! But beware. Pick the island where the pirates(or, as the game lovingly addresses them as, "pireates") are hiding out, and you lose them all!
I don't have a strong opinion of this game. It's just "select an island, hope you don't get hosed." It's almost the same mechanics we saw in Missing Seven Madness, only with a limited amount of chances to grab spins. Still, it's more colorful than that game, so... There's that, I guess?
Sand Dollar Shower. Encountered when 3 or more lines of sand dollars are created at the same time. It's a simple coin toss game. Pick Heads or Tails, and the amount of sand dollars that appear in that zone represents the credits you receive! It's as simple as flipping a coin! ...Only it takes needlessly longer.
Of all the games on this console, this was the one that took the longest to show up. ...And, just like Fruit Salad Whirl, it's anticlimatic and bland... It's just picking a side and raking in the dollars! If you're going to copy mechanics you've done before, why not make it similar to Cherry Bomb Attack and let the player catch sand dollars? If you've resorted to using a coin toss as a game, you've included too many games... And this isn't even the worst offender, as we'll get to soon...
Crazy 8-Ball. Well, there's a casino-themed slot machine, so it only figures to include a pool hall-themed machine on here as well. Rolling into place are white cue balls, while 8 balls serve as Bonuses, and premiums appear as a number of different striped and solid balls! Everything you need to score a strike and win that touchdown! ...I've never played pool...
Also, this is the slot you're least likely to continually win at, so expect to lose about half of your hard-earned credits if you walk in here...
The bonus games are:
Stripe Madness. Encountered when three striped balls show up in a payline. Pick a pocket and shoot the cue into the other balls. If one or more ends up in the hole you chose, you win 10+ spins! ...And get to watch the white ball bounce around for 30 seconds...
This, and several other games on this machine, introduce a needed variation where you launch the ball using the slot lever! It's a welcome changeup, and adds to the experience of launching a pool ball. ...If a pool ball was launched like a pinball... Still, it's more than simply picking an option and seeing what happens, and we get some fun physics mechanics, so this game is pretty fun. ...It's on the same level as waving keys in front of your face, but it's still exciting nonetheless.
Scratch Attack. Encountered after 9 cue balls total have appeared on the payline. You have ONE shot, and one opportunity, to hit the cue ball into the billiards and send them flying! Every ball that lands in a pocket nets you free spins! ...Unless the cue ball ends up sunk, in which case, you lose everything.
This is my favorite game in this slot area, obviously because you get to actually play pool! ...The first shot anyway, but it's a joy watching those balls scatter when you hit them at just the right angle, and seeing which ones are pocketed! ...Though, if the game insults me, I can't kick them. That's the one con here...
9-Ball Challenge. Encountered after 9 9-balls total have appeared on the payline. You're given 9 chances to earn free spins. Position the ball at the top, let it drop, and whichever bin it lands in, you get that number of spins. Repeat and collect your hard-earned winnings! ...Unless you just pressed the button over and over again, in which case, they're "effort-noticed" winnings.
Second favorite game here. Anything that reminds me of Plinko from The Price is Right is doing something correctly! ...It's not as detailed or "free roam" as that variation, but it's still fun to position the ball and see where the randomness takes it. ...That's really all that makes it fun, and really all I need to say!
Solid Action. Encountered when three solid balls show up on the payline. Choose a ball and fling it at the other side! The closer it is to the railing from the other balls, the more spins you receive!
This is a different version of the standard "race" minigame. ...But it's mostly pointless. You need to launch all three balls, but it's completely random where each one will end up, so I don't see why the latter two balls need to also be launched manually! It's that one extra step that ruins it. ...Then again, there's not much to this game, so not much to ruin in the first place...
8-Ball Insanity. Encountered when 2 or more 8-balls show up in the payline. What I'm guessing is the unused name they considered for these slots. Pick a hole and fire off the magic 8-ball! Watch it bounce around, scoring free spins every time it hits the side of the table! If it lands in the hole you picked, your winnings are doubled!
This is fun. ...What else can I say about the pool games at this point? They're all pool, they all share the same table and physics, and they're all fun just to watch. 'Nuff said.
Dame Fortune. This is it! The final slot machine! And since luck is what got you here, it's luck that this machine is themed around! Black cats litter the slots, with lucky number sevens as the Bonus, and horseshoes, stacks of coins, four-leaf clovers, "7" die rolls, and silver stars all joining the party! You've come this far, you've racked up a good amount of cash, and now it's time to... Freely lose it all!
...What? There's nothing after this machine, it's not real money, and you can't redeem your cash for anything, so once you've made enough to spend a while here, there's no reason not to just blow the wad! Experience the thrill of losing all your money without losing all your money! ...Unless you spent it all on this thing, which, given the price at launch, I wouldn't be surprised...
The last few games on this console are:
Luck of the Irish. Encountered when two or more shamrocks appear on the payline. Rainbows fall from the sky, so take your lucky pot of gold and
This is similar to Cherry Bomb Attack, only a bit harder. It's time-based as opposed to ending when a certain number of objects have fallen, rainbows fall out of the sky at random, and the pot's opening is only about half as wide as the basket from the former. Still, it has its own style, and is fun enough to be considered its own thing. Besides, after countless mediocre pool, poker, and racing games, it's time for an action game again!
Box Car Bonus. Encountered when two or more dice appear on the payline. It's a simplistic dice game. Bet anywhere from 1-10 credits, roll the dice, and, as long as you don't get a 6, 7, or 8, your score is multiplied! ...Good luck!
It's almost like Missing Seven Madness, but you only bet once and the winnings are multiplied, instead of risking it every turn. It's a very quick way to get more credits. Also, it's one of the few games that'll reward you for Boxcars or Snake Eyes, so what have you got to lose? ...Besides landing on a 6, 7, or 8?
Pennies From Heaven. Encountered after 9 coins total have shown up on the payline. Flip a coin and call it! If you're correct, you get 10 spins! Keep flipping until you get one wrong and take home everything you've already collected!
...I really don't have anything to say about this one, either. If they've resorted to coin flips, they're scraping the bottom of the barrel at this point...
You can tell they cared a lot for this particular game, considering it's not even in the manual...
Black Cat Bonus. Encountered after 13 black cats in total have shown up on the payline. A black cat is walking on the fence and disturbing your sleep! Throw an endless supply of shoes at it before time runs out! Each hit gets you free credits! ...And an angry visit from PETA.
This is a standard shooter game, made a bit annoying by how there can only be one projectile on the screen at a time. The cat walks back and forth faster and faster as it's hit, so there's another level of challenge to it besides the time limit. It's a unique game for this console, and one of the best animated, so it's one of the Top Ten game on this console. Take that for what it's worth.
Shooting Stars. Encountered after 9 stars total have shown up on the payline. You have 6 bullets and a wheel of stars with numbers that fade and you must remember which stars have which numbers! Wait for a star to show up inside the reticule, hit the button, and collect the number of spins the star promised! It's gets faster and faster, so don't get starry-eyed while playing this game, or you may end up seeing stars!
This last game is basically a combination of Sour Lemon Surprise and Black Cat Bonus. It's a carnival shooter combined with a wheel of fortune. It's one you can lose, but since the stars are so packed together, you practically have to intentionally misfire to not hit a single one! What can I say but that it's a fun way to collect spins. Also it's a decent game to go out on for this console.
And that was Big Bonus Slots! A very elaborate slot machine simulator with a LOT of variety! Sure, the money isn't real, and the graphics are outdated, but it's a good machine to play if you just want to play slots and you've spent your gambling money on something useful for once!
Check it out and see how much you can "Scorce!"
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Design: The console itself is a simple infrared receiver in a black box, so no points there. The controller is a lot more interesting, as it does look like a slot machine! There's a sticker for a screen, flashing lights, a multitude of buttons, and a little lever to pull! ...Unfortunately, it also looks and feels pretty cheap, with most of it a standard black color with no cosmetic enhancements. And while the plastic's not the brittlest I've come across, it still feels like I could crack it if I pushed hard enough... The lights I thought were going to be the best feature, but since they flash EVERY time you pull the lever, they get obnoxious quickly! And since the lever itself is basically just a tiny button, it's easier to simply keep pushing Bet Max every time you play! So while the controller looks the part, it unfortunately only gives the bare minimum, and some of the features that SHOULD have been exciting, they could have done without.
Controls: Pull lever. Receive credits! ...Ok, there's a bit more to it than that, but that's still what you'll be doing 90% of the time. To use the machines, you simply either press the button or pull the lever, and the rest does itself. Some of the bonus games require buttons to be pushed, and which buttons and what they do varies from game to game. Most of the time, Cash Out and Bet Max moves the cursor left/right, while Spin serves as a confirmation button and the lever shoots a ball when applicable. They're varying controls, but they're easy enough to figure out and the game gives you plenty of time to adjust. Overall, no complaints. ...Besides that I'm flat broke most of the time, but that's irrelevant to this category.
Graphics: The graphics are REALLY good for a slot machine simulator. They could have gone with the bare minimum and given us black, white, and yellow colors with a dash of red, just enough to make out the different slots, but they went all out! There are a LOT of colors in this game, more than I can possibly pinpoint, and not only is each icon on the slot machine well defined and colorful given the hardware, but the backgrounds for each machine are varied and different, each adding ambiance to the theme of the current machine! The animation for the machine spinning/stopping is fast and convincing, and there are a good amount of various icons for each machine. The bonus games, while it varies from game to game, are all done competently and given the amount of attention they need. A dice game only requires a few frames to roll the dice, while more action-oriented games require a large environment, detailed characters, and interactive mechanics. ...That's not to say everything was perfect. There were obvious choppy animation cycles, most object movement was simply a stiff Photoshopped image moving along a trajectory, and the text and the outline while selecting seemed standard and unremarkable. Still, nothing I saw hurt my eyes, no color seemed out of place, and I'm surprised this game got ANY animation! Overall, while the detail and animation isn't mind-blowing, it's above average for a game of this genre and gives a lot of ambiance and environment to the whole setting. ...Though they could have done without that googly-eyed cartoon character in the corner, staring at you every time you spun the wheel...
Music & Sound: The only music in this game is a jazzy tune for the main menu, and a quick piano riff whenever the slots spin. They actually don't sound that bad, and I remember them even after exiting the game! In fact, considering that you're sitting in one place for several hours, I'm glad they DIDN'T include a multitude of repetitive five-second loops for each slot and game! Nothing adds to the stress of losing money like having to hear the same track over and over... Sounds are pretty basic, but I'll give them credit that they didn't resort overused stock cartoon sounds. ...Most of the time. There's still a few "squish" and "ding" sounds for certain actions, but for others, it legitimately sounds like a "bonk", or a "whoosh", or the clinking of dice or pool balls, or whatever else it needs to sound like. They're still stock, but the more uncommon stock sounds you don't hear in every game, at least. Overall, the sound and music isn't too bad at all. ...But this is a slot machine, where sound and music don't matter in the first place, so anything is just optional.
Gameplay: ...It's a slot machine. Press button, watch the pretty wheels spin, collect chips. Not exactly Civilization-level complexity we're dealing with. The major of variety comes from the various Bonus Rounds, and my feelings are mixed across the board and depending on the machine. The games from Seven Seventy-Seven were simplistic and fun, with a mix of action, skill, and blind luck to get you ready for the rest of the game. Aces & Eights could have been the most fun, but most of the card games were insultingly dumbed down to relying entirely on pure luck, to the point where any manual input was redundant... Pacific Paradise had a good amount of games that kept you guessing and on your toes, and even though most of them boiled down to luck, there was still some input required that kept them from being monotonous. Crazy 8-Ball is just above Aces & Eights in terms of actual interactivity, and I have to give the games credit for the high frame rates and the random trajectories of the balls, which were fun to watch if nothing else. Dame Fortune seemed like a more challenging version of Seven Seventy-Seven, with a similar line of games and mechanics, most of which relied on skill as much as luck. On the whole, I liked the action games like Cherry Bomb Attack, Coconut Surprise, and Black Cat Bonus the most, while games where I was mindlessly pressing a button, like Texas Hold 'Em, Seahorse Races, and Solid Action I could have done without. I guess I had as much fun as a video slot machine allows, with most of the excitement coming from the turnout of each spin, as opposed to the fun factor of the games themselves. It kept me glued to the screen one way or another, and that's commendable for any kind of game.
Replay Value: The console saves scores and bank amounts, so you can come back anytime and see if you can increase your balance. It's the exact same slots and bonus games each time, but I guess, when you're shooting for credits, aesthetics aren't as important.
Overall:
This is one of the few gambling games I've played I can say has a personality to it. The graphics are varied and fun, there's a lot of different games, and it keeps you hooked as the slots spin over and over again. I'm only giving it a 3/5 because it's not a game for everybody, especially young kids. However, it's a game that kept me glued to the screen through its many different slots and Bonus Rounds, even when I was playing solely to encounter an example of each Bonus Round. Personally, I'd recommend paying the REAL slots, since most of the excitement of gambling games comes from having actual risk tied to them, but if you can't get to a machine, this is probably a close second. If you're the kind where this your genre of choice, check it out! ...Or play one of the MANY smartphone apps. Either one works.
