Saturday, July 7, 2018

Knockoff Console Corner: Vs. Maxx 50 in 1: Intro

...I don't want to do this. ...I REALLY don't want to do this. ...I really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really REALLY don't want to do this! ...But it's time. It's time to start scraping the bottom of the barrel and show you the absolute WORST Plug n Plays have to offer! Let's talk about knockoff Plug n Play games, starting with the Vs Maxx 50 in 1! ...Pray for me, people...

 --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Name: Vs. Maxx 50-in-1
Developer: Senario/JungleTac
Release Date: ???
Console: Plug n Play


















By this point, it think we've accepted it as common knowledge that, if something is or will likely be popular/profitable, the knockoffs/bootlegs will start appearing in droves! While we usually think of knockoff movies or straight-up bootlegged toys when this is brought up, NO field is considered sacred when bootleggers smell possible cash!













We've already seen quite a few of these areas on this blog. Bootleg consoles













 Unlicensed Lego













 Demakes of game classics



















And now it's time to add a new flavor to the pot of disgustingness: Knockoff Plug n Play games! ...A line I hoped I'd NEVER have to return to!















I've been aware of these knockoffs since I first started collecting Plug n Plays YEARS ago! They're some of the hardest things to avoid! Thrift stores, retail stores, eBay, AliExpress, yard sales, it doesn't matter where I go, THEY'RE THERE! Eagerly waiting for someone to notice the next-to-nothing price, the number of games they claim to have, and to think "...Eh. It's worth my time" and unwittingly buy them, not knowing until they get home and plug them in their terrible mistake! They're some of the most contagious electronics I've ever seen! AND THEY'VE INFECTED ME!













Obviously, I don't have EVERY knockoff Plug n Play ever made(thankfully), but even what I DO have is ludicrous! Pirate developers will stick a motherboard in ANYTHING they have lying around! If it has a 1% chance of catching your attention and tricking you out of your money, you can expect them to steal the mold, pour in the cheapest, thinnest plastic possible with the most clashing colors, sandwich a hastily-made motherboard with a basic library of games between the halves, throw it in a box or seal it in a plastic case, and have it on store shelves for $20-50 within a week!

Everything else is done horribly wrong, but they DO have one major thing in common with other Plug n Plays: A lack of a standard casing. These things come in every shape and size, every color and configuration, every look and (un)license! Whatever the geniuses behind these consoles have on hand, they'll turn into a console, resulting in a HUGE mix of not only controller bodies, but control layouts and even a few gimmicks.













You could find one that's just your regular controller shape and layout(though the shoulder buttons are a little uncommon)













While some try to replicate an arcade setup with a joystick and buttons(which looks dangerously similar to the Konami Arcade Advanced console)













Some have the addition of a little steering wheel at the bottom













And some straight-up build an entire wheel into the console*!

Heck, I don't have enough space to show the most elaborate version of this I own!













 Then there are the REALLY strange designs. Think having a console in the shape of a N64 controller is weird?













How about consoles in the shape of N64 controllers WITH light guns built in?! Yes, this is such an inspired idea, more than one company has attempted this!













Why stop at light guns? Throw a fishing reel on there as well!













 Heck, why stop at your standard self-contained Plug n Play? Bootleg the design of entire existing consoles! That'll be enough to trick those grandmas who have no idea what these "Payest Aesions" her grandkids keep talking about are!













 OR... You can bootleg the Dreamcast and Genesis controllers. ...No real joke to end on. It's just something I've noticed with a good number of these consoles.


















These bootleg Plug n Play systems are still being made to this day, continuing to take the form of whatever's available. If you see a console like this that's shaped like a Sonic head... Don't automatically assume it's full of Sega games.

This, and another reason you'll soon discover, is why these games are showing up on Knockoff Console Corner and not Plug n Play Game Corner.













But these are simply cosmetics, and, as with anything, it's not what's on the outside, but what's INSIDE that counts. And what's inside... REALLY sucks! And I'm not just talking about the hardware!

















Bootleg Plug n Play games can be sorted into 3 different extremes. The Straight-Up Bootleg is basically a self-contained multicart(like the CoolBaby NES Classic Clone), promising thousands of NES(and sometimes Genesis) games, when it actually only contains about 10-20 repeated ad nauseam. So if you've ever wanted to play Mario under 3000 different menu names, these consoles are for you!

















The Somewhat "Original" Bootleg is basically a Straight-Up Bootleg, except you can tell they're trying harder to trick you. These consoles have a set number of games, and most of them aren't repeats(though sometimes you may see a game with different modes, like Duck Hunt, split up into different titles...) Each game will also have different titles. Titles you've never heard of before, so you'd be forgiven for thinking they're original games.

















But start one up, and you'll quickly find that "DaDa" is just Popeye with a bad makeover...

















Then there's the "Original" Bootleg. These are the consoles that aren't just unofficial compilations of stolen NES games(hacked or unhacked), and are instead comprised of "original" games made cheaply by Chinese/Taiwanese/Korean studios solely to trick consumers who think "More = Quality." ...I say "original", because libraries of these games are easily copied and stuck on different consoles, so even if they're not directly bootlegging other games, you can find titles from these exact same lists on NUMEROUS consoles from different distributors!


















Also, the occasional blatant copy does sometimes make it onto these compilations...













 I've already given my opinion of multicarts in the past, namely that they're boring and there's no point in judging compilations comprised of stolen games that we're already familiar with, and seeing as how these are just multicarts they stuck the cords and controls onto, there's no point in going over these certain consoles. Maybe I'll do a showcase sometime in the future and briefly go over any gimmicks I can find that set them apart from just playing the real games, but for now, there's no reason to go over games we've seen before.













That leaves us with the "Original" Bootlegs and their libraries of "original" games. And where better to start than with one of the largest compilations I have of one of these libraries: the Vs. Maxx 50-in-1. ...Because I'm a masochist and want to get through as many as I can at once...



I've actually gone over consoles like this one in the past, when I was in the "Direct 2 Disaster" phase of trying to make it as an internet personality(a goal I STILL haven't reached over 4 years later...) However, in that video, I just gave a quick rundown of all the bootleg/knockoff consoles I owned at the time, pointing out an occasional game or feature to make it all fit in a 40 minute video. Thankfully, now that I've switched over to a blog format, I can go into more detail about each console individually, without having to make a 3-4 hour video for each! Therefore, there's nothing stopping me from talking about EVERY game on this console! ...After all, I still don't have to worry about being entertaining, considering I make sure to banish that pesky trait every time I create something...













There's really not much to say about the build of this console. It's in the shape of a standard third-party controller, which, if it was a controller, would be fine. But, since this is a Plug n Play console that's trying to sell itself and convince people to buy it over that copy of Minecraft, detail is... Lacking, to say the least...













The hardware is housed in a semi-transparent purple plastic shell, with no other markings save for some grooves along the sides of the handles that make it slightly easier to hold. It's exactly what you'd expect from a third-party manufacturer that's trying to stand out from official console controllers, but doesn't want to spend any money to make it actually "stand out."













The only actual color is found on the buttons and the directional pad, which have been colored your standard red, blue, yellow, and green.













So while the colors are similar to a Super Famicom controller, the symbols on the buttons are more akin to a PlayStation controller, with X, O, Triangle... And another Triangle. ...I guess they didn't want to come across as too Square?













All games, by the way, use the two buttons on the right. The Triangles are simply Turbo buttons, which really do come in handy. Especially for the games where they came up with the bright idea of having to repeatedly tap the button to shoot...













 The console comes with two directional controls: a thumbstick and a standard directional pad. Unlike other consoles, where the thumbstick is primarily used to move while the directional pad is used for quick actions like ordering troops, these are completely redundant and movement can be carried out with either one. ...Though, you're probably going to use the directional pad more, seeing as how the thumbsticks on these have a habit of being very stiff and breaking often...













Though this is a console with one of these mini-steering wheels built in, so you have another option for the car games. ...Provided the internal spring hasn't snapped because the video was too EXTREME!













Unlike other controllers, instead of Start & Select, this has Start & Reset. The Reset is the only way to get back to the menu(unless you're playing a game with an option to exit or that naturally kicks you out after winning/losing.) Since Select is usually meant to switch between 1 & 2-Player modes on the title screen, and the games on here are strictly One Player, except for a select few that alternate, Select's demise is not much of an issue.













The back is simply plain purple plastic, with the manufacturing information and even the address of the distributor. ...Who has long since moved, so any hate mail or bags of dog dung you might send after playing one of their consoles will just pile on their front step...









Speaking of which, the distributor is Senario, who we were introduced to last week with their Big Bonus Slots game. And while that was part of one of their more decent console lines, the Vs. Maxx series... Isn't.













 Senario released a LOT of different consoles under the Vs. Maxx name, each with differing shapes and numbers of games, but most sharing similar titles and libraries. They were cheap, they were everywhere, and they're still floating around to this day everywhere you look, thanks to how many of them were produced and how many different chains distributed them...

















Though some were a bit of a change-up for the line, such as a 10-in-1 Casino game, and the Maxx Play, which contained a large library of sprite-swapped NES games. But it also had a light gun built into it, so clearly it's the best console ever made!










While there's no mention of them on the console or games(at least, not that I caught, maybe there's a mention hidden in the code), the vast majority, if not all, of the games on this console were programmed by JungleTac.

JungleTac is a Chinese game production company, and one of the kings of unofficial 8/16-bit games and consoles, having not only developed hundreds of games, but also having worked with other prolific unofficial developers like Nice Code, Shenzhen Nanjing, and Waixing, all of whom have been, or will soon be, featured here.














Most of their output has seen distribution in dozens of different Plug n Play and handheld consoles for a number of electronics distributors, who have either rebranded JungleTac-produced consoles with their trademark, or have commissioned JungleTac to make original consoles for them. They're one of the reasons Lexibook has a share in the gaming market...

















Their more well-known consoles include the VG Pocket, distributed by Pelican Accssories














 And the Vii. The Holy Grail of Wii knockoffs!













I've even unknowingly featured some of their work on this blog before, as they're the company responsible for the first three arcade ports on the Konami Arcade Advanced console! ...Which were also the worst ports on there, so let that serve as a clue to today's feature...














They were established in 1999, and are apparently still around today, continuing to distribute both 8 and 16-bit consoles to whomever will buy them... Hey. Guilty.













The console boots up with... How do I put this politely? ...One of the most eye-bleeding title screens I've ever seen! The mix of bright, loud, unfitting colors, the heavily-pixellated artwork, just how cluttered and unrecognizable a lot of it is, it is AWFUL! It's legitimately one of the most unintentionally nausea-inducing images I've ever seen, and a good clue that whatever money you spent on this, even if it was a gift, you were overcharged!













And don't think that this is as bad as it gets. If anything, the colors get even MORE unappealing! JungleTac(as well as other companies who possibly had games included on this) have a huge fetish for the UGLIEST color palettes ever used in any form of media! Bile greens, neon pinks, baby blues, bright oranges, ugly browns, urine yellows, all are vomited all over every single digital canvas that make up the sprites and backgrounds of these games!













They're used so much, half the time, you can't tell what you're looking at! Sprites just blend into the background, with virtually nothing to distinguish them from other objects in each game! It gets so bad, you're better off drawing the sprites yourself on a piece of paper and PRETENDING to play the game! At least then, you'll be able to tell what you're looking at! ...Unless your artwork is just that bad. ...I'm not judging...













 It's made no better with the tuneless drek they call music playing in the background. All the music, ALL the music, used across this console are some of the most ear-grating tracks I've heard from ANYTHING! Every single one struggles for rhythm, constantly fading in and out or slowing down and speeding up at random. And what DOES get through are the most sickly-sweet, unfitting scores that even a budget 80s girl toy TV show would want to smother in concrete! They're so cheerful and upbeat, yet uncaring and bland, that it sounds like somebody took the unconcentrated essence of other 8-bit tunes from upbeat, colorful games(Super Mario Bros, Kirby's Adventure, a truckload of licensed toy tie-ins, etc.), fed it into a continually malfunctioning computer, and didn't bother to make any changes to make anything stand out or even fit the type of game it was being used with! It's music made of pure Ritalin, and might actually be the first example of audio that'll put you at risk for diabetes!













 It's not helped by how similar each of the tracks sound. I like to say that all the music in certain games sound the same, but in this case, I think they LITERALLY use the same track over and over again, just with a few notes added/removed/replaced! I had to go back and listen to several of the games again to make sure there were more than 2-3 orchestrations! ...But even then, yes, they DO reuse some of the tracks for different games! The exact same music that accompanied a puzzle game can show up later in a space shooter! Even the music that plays over the opening card is reused for several games! And really, I don't know what's sadder: The fact that the music is so lazy, or that I'm technically caring more about the music than they did just by screaming about it!

My advice: If you're going to play these games, mute the TV and play some background music that's easier on the ears.
















 Like nails on a chalkboard...













 I guess at this point, I need to actually talk about the 50 games on this console, which are all laid out in the standard list form against a black background. Alright. Here's EVERY SINGLE game, and how it plays. ...Help...

However, because we have FIFTY games to get through, and a LOT of pictures to accompany these games, I'm going to do a first and split this look into several parts, to take pity on those with slow connections. Link's at the bottom of the page, which you can click on after this brief message from Brick Miser!

"A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush! Whereas a can of soda in the hand is worth about $13.75. I think I got the best deal of my life with the soda!"

Click For Part 2

No comments:

Post a Comment